Panta Rei, thoughts on turning 60 (From 2017)

PANTA REI, everything flows meaning that everything is constantly changing. Heraclitus.Coincidentally we are staying at Villa Heraclea in Hvar

A milestone is in general for me a moment to reflect on the person in various occasions I was asked to speak. In many cases it was a birthday, wedding, celebration but also to say farewell to dear ones. Professionally i have many opportunities to talk, give lectures and also coach and mentor people first inside my company but now more and more at external Congresses or Conferences and even some top Universities which I truly nourish and enjoy! During all these lecturing and speaking events I was talking about a person or a range of selected topics.

So this time I am going to reverse this, in stead of me talking about others, its me sharing a bit about myself. I am sure most of this is known by you and maybe utterly boring. Therefor its not a story with anecdotes about me and as you know i have many but some lessons I've learned and want to share. Recent studies are saying that children want to know much more from there parents and who they really are. Maybe because of my own life I am  very keen to learn about my own roots and as you know currently I'm researching my father's life during WW 2 and a bit more about the Dubois family as very little is known.

People:

In a few days I will turn 60 and all things considered I can look back at a truly great, meaningful and rich life. Nothing was easy, every step was hard work, there are no real gifts in life so you gotta earn it. You the children had a great part of that, children are important engineers of happiness because they're catalysts, helping their parents transform from a self-centered view to a more mature, exocentric perspective on life, in other words they "teach" that happiness is often greater when it comes through giving rather than receiving. You have dome that for me, merci beaucoup! And of course my little sister. We've had a complex and rich youth, with many remarkable moments, from a life saving act in the muddy grounds behind de Begoniastraat to trashing my cart with LP's from the top of the stairs! And there are those who are no longer here and I'm thinking about them if not daily at least weekly. Mijn moeder, Ad en Isaac en my father, listening to others and reading stuff I believe a lot of my father resides in me. And I'm proud of that.

Inge, discovered at a school trip in Germany in 1973, love at first sight and who could have thought the various chapters in life we walked together. We are very different and yet soo much in common. She gets me in places I never thought possible, from the mountains in Breckenridge (40) all the way to the Islands of Croatia and Hvar (60). It is an amazing journey with too many highlights to mention and i can assure you we are both still going strong! There are new chapters to be opened such as becoming grand parents, a migrating career and a new life in the Midi, that isn't about positive change, that's Good Vibrations!

60 and still going strong!

Places: 

Born and growing up in Roosendaal small city with "bekende lui" zoals George Knobel, Theo Lazeroms, Fons Rademakers & Jef Rademakers. When I was about 22 or so i started dreaming about living in New York, London and Paris and visiting many other cities. That happened. As an absolute bonus was my almost one year in Rio de Janeiro, the Cidade Maravilhosa and now we are very fortunate to living and experiencing (part-time)  Amsterdam!

Starting at Royal Dutch Shell as the youngest team member, moved to United Brands in Rotterdam, both companies were major eye openers, then Sopexa Den Haag evolved to FFWF in New York, Rothschild, BMG Classics, LVMH-Hennessy (my biggest disappointment), Market Bridge and now Nokia. I worked with remarkable people, with maybe 2 exceptions, and was also able to let others shine, thus subordinates-peers and hierarchy. The greatest period I believe was my 5 years at BMG, that had everything from entrepreneur to strategist to all aspects of a global business, for sure the funniest period. Also not to be forgotten was the work which ended not in a material success: Lifeties the start-up with Chuck. A remarkable experience with a few lessons about myself I simply will never forget!

Time:

Giving away

As a father my list of extremely valuable personal experiences, these are based on 60 years of which 32 as a Faja and about 35 as a manager leading others.

1. Start a day with a smile and the day will be nice to you. Respect others, compliment others, share, be generous. Attitude is important invest in maximizing a positive mindset. Think positive and nurture positive expectations
2. Don't wait initiate and take charge. Become an advocate of change, thats also how you've been brought up. Easy thus! Kick ass and take names!
3. Be curious, inquisitive and do something about it. Think outside the box, challenge the status quo  Be ambitious, set targets with small milestones, share. Pay attention to the little things
4. Get involved with a "purpose", start local migrate to international. Don't sit on the bench, be a player. Follow "the world", economics, political, environment, social and much more. Try to comprehend how it all works, or more importantly how it doesn't function  
5. Challenge and refresh yourselves, find new people, make new friends along life's journey
6. In life, and even more professionally early on in your career find people who appreciate who you are and what you do. Potentially one of them might be able to help, guide you. We need supporters and sponsors. 
7. Look for challenging environments. Real success is measured not by what one has achieved but by the obstacles that were overcome
8. When work is pleasure, life is joy. When work is a duty, life is slavery. When we feel that what we do makes a difference, our life has more meaning
9. Reflect and value your own history, you have an utterly divers, valuable and unique background. Family remains the pinnacle and please make efforts to engage and keep this inspiring circle warm, fun and a safe heaven
10. Dream, dream, never stop dreaming!

What I really like: reading and by preferences non-fiction, bio's of US Presidents or business leaders, history, sports...to many to mention, wines, my grande caffee Brasileiro, to much to drink but certainly enough to enjoy and appreciate, music, rock and roll, bossa nova, jazz and  with a few outspoken favorites. Growing up with CSNY Deja Vu, Led Zeppelin and of course the Beatles, Bee Gees and Stones, attending rock concerts, from probably 15 years onwards to Golden Earrings, Focus, Kayak, Alquin, Solution, Cuby and the Blizzards to the best Dutch band ever: Brainbox. Later many acts with special places for two guys: Bruce Springsteen or Bob Dylan concert to me is much more than going to a concert, its ......Sometimes I can reminiscing about my soccer years, the great games,  reading some clippings it was a special and privileged period, or the NYC marathons these runs were extremely special and emotional to me or being by myself reading.

Life is seldom an upstream road and rarely predictable. Events occur they can be pleasant, surprising but also disturbing it can provide a laugh and a cry and often uncontrollable, what one can control is your destiny and the way you walk through life. Change is a given so find ways to deal with it, its my total conviction that i have given 300% to get the most out of these 59+ years and I have no intention to change that pattern! Everyone of you have given me the spirit and strengths to live the life I could only dream on. 

Running out of the fifties and stepping with a smile in the sixties! Carpe Diem.